National Beer Month: A Love Story
by Chip of Champagne
February is the month of beer and love, and how the latter was saved by the former. Let me explain.
As a lad, I was seduced by the sweetest singing siren of them all, Lady Golf. At the start, it was magical. Sunny spring days, free swinging, elbows flying, not a care or concern in the world. It was a passing fancy at best, a whim, just one of those things, or so I thought.
Youth being youth, I dallied with baseball, basketball, football, wrestling and even her country club sister, tennis. I played around with parlor games too, like pool, darts and guessing the weight of fat chicks. I wasn't a complete cad. I would occasionally take her out for a romp on a daisy clad muni, or for laughs, a bucket at the range, nothing serious. She had other plans. When scorned, Lady G can be cold, relentless demanding and unforgiving. Her demeanor becomes a smidgen less civil than the combatants on the Jerry Springer Show. She had her claws in me.
My jump shot became a dietary supplement, all iron. Those doubles down the line became two hoppers to short. My life was in chaos. She wanted me to practice, keep score, get a handicap, and egad, wear ARGYLE! I was spinning out of control. Enter beer.
It was beer who talked me down from the ledge the day I received my first handicap (28) card. When my drives and putts covered the same distance, long or short, beer was there for me. The tourney I entered the wrong score and lost by a stroke, my pal was in the clubhouse silently waiting.
Beer, as a support group may not work for everyone. Some of the guys, for example, get married with hope the "other woman" will negate Lady Golf's mystic feminine powers. Still others, those poor inflicted souls with the yips or the shanks seek a higher power, like our pro Dana. Whatever your support group is, relationships are difficult. So as you lean on them in these trying times and in your own way salute them. Cheers.
To commemorate Chip's one year anniversary the first 20 members wearing ascots at the Feb. 4th 2-Man tourney will receive a free beer. See Denny Andersen for details.